The responses to the newpaper on the article I posted floored me. I can’t begin to understand the judgment of the mother. It was suggested that her child wasn’t really disabled. People cried foul that any 4 year old would be on the bus at all- let alone a disabled one. One person even suggested that the mother sent the daughter to school so that she could rest.
My stance on this is very clear- no child should be forgotten. This exact situation is something I fear for Little Bug. When we first signed him up for school, he was slated to go on a bus that would take him to the school for emotionally disabled 18 to 21 year olds. When we called, there wasn’t an apology- just it’s a good thing you called, because we would have sent him to Park Ave.
The judgment of that mother and child infuriated me. Maybe people outside the special education system don’t understand that here they push busing of all kids. Little Bug lives 6 blocks away from his school and rides the bus. We had several meetings about it as Nick and I were concerned with his safety and the ability of the driver to care for him. The school felt that he should ride the bus to encourage independence and to assimilate with his peers.
I was surprised how off track people got with this story. Questioning whether apraxia is really a disability or not and the motives of the mother. Who gives a shit? What matters is that a child was left of the bus for hours. I don’t care whether that child was disabled or not and why they were on the bus- it shouldn’t have happened. This would be terrifying for any child and parent. This would make any parent demand the bus driver’s job and then some.
Tuesday, February 9, 2010
Friday, February 5, 2010
I can't even imagine
Girl, 4 and developmentally disabled, left on school bus for hours
By SHOMARI STONE
KOMO-TV
BAINBRIDGE ISLAND -- A mother is outraged after her developmentally-challenged daughter was left on a school bus for nearly three hours.
"There's anger. There's outrage. There's hurt, just sadness," said the mother, Sarah Rowe.
Rowe put her 4-year-old daughter, Ava Rowe, on a small bus around 11:15 a.m. on Wednesday. The bus driver dropped off two kids at Ordway Elementary School, returned to the bus barn,and forgot all about Ava Rowe, even though the driver was only responsible for three passengers.
The forgotten girl in a car seat on the bus, alone for three hours. The shy young girl has speech apraxia, a neurological disorder that hinders her ability to speak.
When the bus dropped Ava Rowe back at home, her mother noticed something was wrong. Her daughter looked sad.
"She (my daughter) said, 'She (the driver) left. She said, 'I waiting, and waiting, and waiting.' And she told me again and again. She cried, and cried, and cried," Sarah Rowe said. "Eyes all puffy and really upset. With her speech apraxia, she really couldn't verbalize what was going on."
Officials from the Bainbridge Island School District called about an hour later and admitted the driver had made a mistake by failing to follow procedure.
Superintendent Janet Chapel said the bus driver didn't walk through the bus as instructed, but she doesn't know why.
"I don't know if there's an explanation. It certainly did not happen," she said.
And it appears the driver wasn't the only one who didn't follow procedure. Ava Rowe's teacher did not notice she was absent, even though teachers are instructed to check attendance.
"That procedure was not followed," said Sarah Rowe.
Sarah Rowe demands to know why the bus driver still has a job. The driver has been placed on paid administrative leave, but the mother believes she should be fired.
"Absolutely. Now. This second," she said.
District officials expect to wrap up its own investigation into the matter over the next few days.
By SHOMARI STONE
KOMO-TV
BAINBRIDGE ISLAND -- A mother is outraged after her developmentally-challenged daughter was left on a school bus for nearly three hours.
"There's anger. There's outrage. There's hurt, just sadness," said the mother, Sarah Rowe.
Rowe put her 4-year-old daughter, Ava Rowe, on a small bus around 11:15 a.m. on Wednesday. The bus driver dropped off two kids at Ordway Elementary School, returned to the bus barn,and forgot all about Ava Rowe, even though the driver was only responsible for three passengers.
The forgotten girl in a car seat on the bus, alone for three hours. The shy young girl has speech apraxia, a neurological disorder that hinders her ability to speak.
When the bus dropped Ava Rowe back at home, her mother noticed something was wrong. Her daughter looked sad.
"She (my daughter) said, 'She (the driver) left. She said, 'I waiting, and waiting, and waiting.' And she told me again and again. She cried, and cried, and cried," Sarah Rowe said. "Eyes all puffy and really upset. With her speech apraxia, she really couldn't verbalize what was going on."
Officials from the Bainbridge Island School District called about an hour later and admitted the driver had made a mistake by failing to follow procedure.
Superintendent Janet Chapel said the bus driver didn't walk through the bus as instructed, but she doesn't know why.
"I don't know if there's an explanation. It certainly did not happen," she said.
And it appears the driver wasn't the only one who didn't follow procedure. Ava Rowe's teacher did not notice she was absent, even though teachers are instructed to check attendance.
"That procedure was not followed," said Sarah Rowe.
Sarah Rowe demands to know why the bus driver still has a job. The driver has been placed on paid administrative leave, but the mother believes she should be fired.
"Absolutely. Now. This second," she said.
District officials expect to wrap up its own investigation into the matter over the next few days.
Tuesday, January 26, 2010
He can do it!
The newest thing for Little Bug to say is “I can’t do it- too hard!” He now says this at least once a day about any number of things. Personally, this is a pet peeve of mine. Anyone who knows me, knows that I am determined- to the point of bullheadness- and value independence. While we don’t know how independent Little Bug may turn out to be, we want to ensure that he has every chance to be independent.
Little Bug has begun trying to undress himself. At first, shirts were being shimmied down the body in some elaborate dance; however he has finally figured it out. He looked at us and yelled, “I can do it!”
Yes he can- and we always will push for that answer.
Little Bug has begun trying to undress himself. At first, shirts were being shimmied down the body in some elaborate dance; however he has finally figured it out. He looked at us and yelled, “I can do it!”
Yes he can- and we always will push for that answer.
Teaching someone to be a good friend
One of the things we struggle with the most is the lack of empathy. Little Bug has an incredibly hard time understanding that other people feel things completely different from what you do- you know, mind blindness.
A new child joined the school last month and has cried every day since- on the way there, during all portions of preschool, and on the way home. Needless to say, this is a bit much for Little Bug. Every time he gets off the bus, he tells us about the little boy, “E was fying fying fying. I said No fying- be quiet!”
We have told him how to be a good friend- you could say that we practice this. Nick will pretend to cry and I tell Little Bug things he could say to make Nick feel better. We talk about how Little Bug cries sometimes and the things we tell him. No change. Every day, he comes home with stories about how he told E to stop crying.
I don’t know how else to teach this- Nick and I are empathetic and caring- for each other, him, our family, and friends. Little Bug sees this modeled all the time. However, it isn’t picked up. Is there another way to teach this?
A new child joined the school last month and has cried every day since- on the way there, during all portions of preschool, and on the way home. Needless to say, this is a bit much for Little Bug. Every time he gets off the bus, he tells us about the little boy, “E was fying fying fying. I said No fying- be quiet!”
We have told him how to be a good friend- you could say that we practice this. Nick will pretend to cry and I tell Little Bug things he could say to make Nick feel better. We talk about how Little Bug cries sometimes and the things we tell him. No change. Every day, he comes home with stories about how he told E to stop crying.
I don’t know how else to teach this- Nick and I are empathetic and caring- for each other, him, our family, and friends. Little Bug sees this modeled all the time. However, it isn’t picked up. Is there another way to teach this?
Tuesday, January 19, 2010
A Dream is Born
Sometimes, dreams are wonderfully born from a pivotal occurrence in someone’s life. Other times, they grow from steady determination and immersion-with a sprinkle of kismet. For Little Bug, I believe it is that later.
We all know that he has been obsessed with sharks; however he has now added whales, dolphins, turtles, and fishes to his repertoire of marine life. He has basically given up regular kid shows, favoring Discovery and National Geographic specials.
Yesterday, we took him to the aquarium again. It was an amazing trip and the realization of a dream. He watched the sharks and fishes in the tank and began to explain why some were fish and some were sharks. He pointed at a big Sturgeon and explained that it couldn’t be a shark because it only had one dorsal fin.
His light bulb moment came from the Seattle waterfronts new problem- tons and tons of jellyfish that shouldn’t be here and they can’t figure out how to get rid of. Little Bug and I were waiting for Nick on a pier and looking at the water. Suddenly, a bit of pink could be spotted. He yelled, “Jellyfish!” and began to jump up and down.
I watched and waited to see what it was. I was a little nervous that it was trash and he would be disappointed. More and more pink began to become visible along with some white and orange. Finally, a huge jellyfish appeared. Right behind it came a flock of tiny opaque jellies. This was Little Bug’s first experience with sea life outside of an aquarium.
He looked at me and said, “I’ma learn bout sharks.”
“Do you mean watching your movies and reading your books?”
“No! Ima swim with sharks- tiger sharks….whale sharks… bull sharks… jelly fishes…. Squid”
“Do you mean a biologist?”
“Yep. I’ma beelologist!”
Dreams are fragile, fragile things. This is something we weren’t sure we would ever get to experience with Little Bug. Nick and I will move mountains and go to hell and back to make sure he has every opportunity to become a beelologist.
We all know that he has been obsessed with sharks; however he has now added whales, dolphins, turtles, and fishes to his repertoire of marine life. He has basically given up regular kid shows, favoring Discovery and National Geographic specials.
Yesterday, we took him to the aquarium again. It was an amazing trip and the realization of a dream. He watched the sharks and fishes in the tank and began to explain why some were fish and some were sharks. He pointed at a big Sturgeon and explained that it couldn’t be a shark because it only had one dorsal fin.
His light bulb moment came from the Seattle waterfronts new problem- tons and tons of jellyfish that shouldn’t be here and they can’t figure out how to get rid of. Little Bug and I were waiting for Nick on a pier and looking at the water. Suddenly, a bit of pink could be spotted. He yelled, “Jellyfish!” and began to jump up and down.
I watched and waited to see what it was. I was a little nervous that it was trash and he would be disappointed. More and more pink began to become visible along with some white and orange. Finally, a huge jellyfish appeared. Right behind it came a flock of tiny opaque jellies. This was Little Bug’s first experience with sea life outside of an aquarium.
He looked at me and said, “I’ma learn bout sharks.”
“Do you mean watching your movies and reading your books?”
“No! Ima swim with sharks- tiger sharks….whale sharks… bull sharks… jelly fishes…. Squid”
“Do you mean a biologist?”
“Yep. I’ma beelologist!”
Dreams are fragile, fragile things. This is something we weren’t sure we would ever get to experience with Little Bug. Nick and I will move mountains and go to hell and back to make sure he has every opportunity to become a beelologist.
Talk about Pretend Play!
Little Bug has been on a Toy Story kick recently. One of the parts that he finds the most amusing is when Buzz is made to wear and apron and a hat and has a tea party. Recently, he decided that this would be a fun thing to do with his Sharks- Blue and Bull.
He set up his Lightening McQueen table and chairs- making sure that the chairs we opposite so that Blue and Bull could sit facing each other. He gathered his plastic dishes from the kitchen so that he could serve the food. The food he cooked was his cut up veggie set that had been lovingly cooked into a soup in a colander.
He gathered his guests around that table and passed out food. They took turns telling him how tasty the food was and asking how he was doing.
Nick and I stood and watched with our jaws hanging open. He only other version of pretend play is driving cars and trains around or making his sharks and fish swim. This was so far beyond what we thought he could do.
He wasn’t done.
After the sharks were done eating, they had to go home. He disabled the table and put the soup away and then put the chairs in a line. At the front of the line, he put the stairs to his bed. “A bus!” The sharks rode the bus home- all the time telling Little Bug that they had fun and would see him soon.
He set up his Lightening McQueen table and chairs- making sure that the chairs we opposite so that Blue and Bull could sit facing each other. He gathered his plastic dishes from the kitchen so that he could serve the food. The food he cooked was his cut up veggie set that had been lovingly cooked into a soup in a colander.
He gathered his guests around that table and passed out food. They took turns telling him how tasty the food was and asking how he was doing.
Nick and I stood and watched with our jaws hanging open. He only other version of pretend play is driving cars and trains around or making his sharks and fish swim. This was so far beyond what we thought he could do.
He wasn’t done.
After the sharks were done eating, they had to go home. He disabled the table and put the soup away and then put the chairs in a line. At the front of the line, he put the stairs to his bed. “A bus!” The sharks rode the bus home- all the time telling Little Bug that they had fun and would see him soon.
Wednesday, January 6, 2010
Growing Pains
Little Bug keeps advancing in sudden and surprising ways. Some are mundane and others are extraordinary. I wanted to share with you all the exciting things that have happened on our vacation. (By the way, sorry for the delay in posts- Christmas time is crazy personally and professionally.)
• A big boy car seat- yep you read that right. The booster seat kind that he only buckles into. In general, this is the more worrisome to Nick and I as he can get out of it and likes to talk about the “red button” (the seat belt release) every time we’re in the car. We are looking for a cover for it so that he doesn’t escape.
• Pretend play- as in self directed lengthy pretend play. He will set up his trains and have them pretend to go places- the garden, school, and Target. They talk to each other, fight, and play. He describes their emotions- cross, happy, excited, and sad. He will play independently for upwards of half an hour in his imaginary world.
• Big boy bed. He has chosen to sleep in it by himself. While he still makes trips back to our bed, he is pretty good about going to sleep in it and staying there. I am sure the reward goal of a Thomas Blanket has helped him stay motivated.
• A normal childhood fear. Rather than a sensory based fear that is mind boggling, he has become afraid of the dark. While this may seem strange to rejoice in, it is nice to have a straight forward problem that tons of kids (and some adults too) deal with.
• Choosing the play place over his parents. At a local grocery store, they have a play place where the children can be watched while the parents grocery shop. The one caveat is that parents aren’t welcome. He has always wanted to go, but never without us. Finally, one day, he decided that he could do it. He stayed in there for 45 minutes and Nick and I waited for the page of doom. They take your information and page you should your child become out of hand or stink. We didn’t receive a page.
• Last but not least, peeing standing up. He has decided that this is the way to do it. He will not sit on the potty ring anymore- for babies is what he says. Granted, he hasn’t successfully peed this way in the bathroom. He has however peed this way in the bedroom and the kitchen. He also has provided us with a ton of laughter. When he first tried to do it, he stood in front of the toilet and frowned. He looked at me and said, “It’s not working!” Trying to keep a straight face, I explained that he didn’t have to pee. He felt that I was incorrect and took to tapping it- like you would to see if a microphone works- and yelled at it, “WORK! WORK!” I haven’t laughed so hard in my whole life.
This vacation was amazing because it was the first time that he was able to understand the holiday. To me, Christmas is about kids. I know that a lot of people celebrate it for religious reasons, but I personally celebrate it for family and most especially the kids.
Little Bug had a blast. He would open each present and say something nice about it and then say thank you to whomever gave it to him. He wasn’t the greedy hoarding present type, the truly excited and wanting to unwrap everyone’s for them type. Our family had a great time.
The hardest thing about the growing process is the growing pains for the parents. Nick and I found ourselves in tears of happiness and sadness. When things are changing, you notice the impact that the little person has had on your life. We are overjoyed to see this development and truly grateful. We are also a little sad…
• A big boy car seat- yep you read that right. The booster seat kind that he only buckles into. In general, this is the more worrisome to Nick and I as he can get out of it and likes to talk about the “red button” (the seat belt release) every time we’re in the car. We are looking for a cover for it so that he doesn’t escape.
• Pretend play- as in self directed lengthy pretend play. He will set up his trains and have them pretend to go places- the garden, school, and Target. They talk to each other, fight, and play. He describes their emotions- cross, happy, excited, and sad. He will play independently for upwards of half an hour in his imaginary world.
• Big boy bed. He has chosen to sleep in it by himself. While he still makes trips back to our bed, he is pretty good about going to sleep in it and staying there. I am sure the reward goal of a Thomas Blanket has helped him stay motivated.
• A normal childhood fear. Rather than a sensory based fear that is mind boggling, he has become afraid of the dark. While this may seem strange to rejoice in, it is nice to have a straight forward problem that tons of kids (and some adults too) deal with.
• Choosing the play place over his parents. At a local grocery store, they have a play place where the children can be watched while the parents grocery shop. The one caveat is that parents aren’t welcome. He has always wanted to go, but never without us. Finally, one day, he decided that he could do it. He stayed in there for 45 minutes and Nick and I waited for the page of doom. They take your information and page you should your child become out of hand or stink. We didn’t receive a page.
• Last but not least, peeing standing up. He has decided that this is the way to do it. He will not sit on the potty ring anymore- for babies is what he says. Granted, he hasn’t successfully peed this way in the bathroom. He has however peed this way in the bedroom and the kitchen. He also has provided us with a ton of laughter. When he first tried to do it, he stood in front of the toilet and frowned. He looked at me and said, “It’s not working!” Trying to keep a straight face, I explained that he didn’t have to pee. He felt that I was incorrect and took to tapping it- like you would to see if a microphone works- and yelled at it, “WORK! WORK!” I haven’t laughed so hard in my whole life.
This vacation was amazing because it was the first time that he was able to understand the holiday. To me, Christmas is about kids. I know that a lot of people celebrate it for religious reasons, but I personally celebrate it for family and most especially the kids.
Little Bug had a blast. He would open each present and say something nice about it and then say thank you to whomever gave it to him. He wasn’t the greedy hoarding present type, the truly excited and wanting to unwrap everyone’s for them type. Our family had a great time.
The hardest thing about the growing process is the growing pains for the parents. Nick and I found ourselves in tears of happiness and sadness. When things are changing, you notice the impact that the little person has had on your life. We are overjoyed to see this development and truly grateful. We are also a little sad…
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